Tips on dealing with grief?

[Madison]

I’m struggling so much right now. Last night my bunny, Oliver, died in my arms. He was 2 years old. A little backstory. I had come home a couple days ago and noticed Oliver’s face was swollen. Being a Saturday at 1am I rushed him to the er vet to see what was up. They did a bunch of tests. His teeth looked good, blood results came back fine and he wasn’t fighting any infection, skin around swelling was healthy. She came to the conclusion he must have gotten bit by something and had an allergic reaction. She gave him a shot of antihistamine and sent me home with some anti inflammatory drugs and benydryl. We got home about 4am and he was acting okay. I woke up the next morning anD he was very lethargic and wouldn’t eat. I tried his favorite foods, nothing worked. I eventually started syringe feeding him because he hadn’t eaten in 6 hours and I know all about GI stasis. Eventually he stopped taking the food altogether. I just sat and held him crying. He started breathing funny, almost gasping for air. He’d let out whimpers at times. After 30 minutes of just singing to him AMD trying to comfort him he seized up, gritting his teeth in the most awful way and then went limp. He breathed 5 more breaths and then nothing. I cannot stop replaying him dying in my head and its killing me. Everytime I look at his littermate I cant help but cry. She is doing better than me. I cant get those awful images out of my head. I’m just hurting so much, I dont know what to do.

[Tanya]

I am very sorry. I lost my bunny today too. I know the feeling, it’s horrible, it’s killing inside but it happened, you went to the vet, you tried your best and you loved your bunny. A huge hug, I came here with the similar issue and I really hope we both can recover as well as their mates.

[Tanya]

I am very sorry. I lost my bunny today too. I know the feeling, it’s horrible, it’s killing inside but it happened, you went to the vet, you tried your best and you loved your bunny. A huge hug, I came here with the similar issue and I really hope we both can recover as well as their mates.

[Madison]

I’m so sorry you are going through this as well, it truly is the most awful feeling I’ve experienced. I really hope too that we are able to get through this tough time. I’ve found that spending time with my other bunny has helped me a little through the process. Hugs to you

[chessiesdad]

I am very sorry for your loss. I lost a young rabbit in the beginning of February and it happened very quickly, much like what happened to you. It’s very hard, I know. My only advice is not to try to stifle what you feel. Let it out – your grief and your tears and give your love to the bunny that’s still with you. It takes time, but you will get through. I am and many hear have gone through this pain. Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

[DanaNM]

I’m so sorry for your loss. I’ve lost two bunnies before my eyes, and it is so traumatic. I was the same… just replaying it over and over.

All I can say is it gets better with time. You did everything you could… when bunnies start to crash.. they crash. It sounds like something very serious was wrong, and as bunnies are prey animals, very serious problems often start out looking like something treatable.

In time you might like to share some memories or photos of Oliver here, to help remember him as his happy and healthy self. You might eventually like to make a photo book of him. When we lost Bunston, all I could think of at first were his final moments, and I was worried that would overtake the memory of the life he had with us. I started jotting down any happy memories of him whenever they came to mind, it really helped me. About 2 years later I finally was ready to put together a photo book of him.

It can also be hard to see bonded mates doing well with the loss of their mate, even though it brings guilt to feel that way (and the alternative… them sinking into deep depression is even worse). Bertha seemed to be totally unphased when Bunston passed, at first. But over time I started seeing the subtle evidence of sadness as the weeks went by. Remember that bunnies hide pain of all sorts…. you two can be a source of comfort to each other, even if it’s hard to tell. I’m sure she will appreciate some extra cuddles from you, and you can help each other heal. (I’ve cried with Bertha too many times now sadly, as she’s been widowed twice).

Hugs to you and (((Binky free Oliver))) <3

. . . The answers provided in this discussion are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet. Seek the advice of your veterinarian or a qualified behaviorist.  

[Muffin]

Many condolences for Oliver, I’m sure he was a beautiful and happy bun who lived very well.

Of course you’re going to replay it in your head, only natural but you can also use that to see that you did EVERYTHING you could, he had a vet trip, you watched him well, cared for him and comforted him. While an unexpected and unfortunate end, it sounds like a wonderful way to go. All snuggled up to you being loved and comforted, many will die when their owners are not around.

 Not fun to think about but many buns do go this way, if it’s any comfort to you. Half seem to go quietly and the other half seem to have bit of a struggle to gain their angel wings. He would have felt nothing of the seizure and would not have been in pain.

Time is the other answer, it will get easier with time, you just need to ride though these hard time, keep your chin up and keep busy. Remind yourself of how great of a time his life was and how well cared for and loved he was. Short life or long, it was beautiful I’m sure.

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