Bonding Journal (Help!)

[X&B]

Hello all…

So I am not usually one to ask for advice or post in groups of any kind (I’m more of an extensive research and execute kind of person), but I am attempting to bond two rabbits for the first time and honestly am just out of my element completely.

I took my female rabbit (Xena) home about two years ago when I was still in college. I graduated and started a full time job about 8 months ago, and ever since have felt like she needed more companionship. After taking her on a few bunny dates, I brought home a beautiful (and very large) male, Bolt. They have both been neutered for over a year, and while it wasn’t love at first sight, there was definitely good enough signs for me to want to give it a try.

The bonding sessions started off well, but it is now day three of actual face to face time and their behaviors are just so confusing! I will start with day one and work my way up to today but first some context. I live in an apartment with Xena. She is pretty much free roam, so as you can imagine, there are not many places she hasn’t been. When Bolt first came home, I set up both their cages in my guest bedroom. Well, Xena’s cage and Bolt’s pen. He is probably three times larger than her, as she is a dwarf of some kind. I put them about 6 inches apart, with litter boxes on the far ends and food closest to one another. Their litter boxes are quite different in size, so while I haven’t been switching them out, I have been putting the litter from one into the other and vice versa, so that they could get used to each other’s scent. For neutral territory, I picked the bathtub with a towel laid in it because it’s literally the only place in the whole apartment Xena hasn’t been.

Day 1:

On this day they were in the tub for about a half an hour. They both groomed themselves. Xena briefly humped Bolt (very funny image because he is so much bigger than her) but then seemed to get bored. Bolt was still during this as I was petting him when it happened. I put them together and pet them as well. There was hay spread out and they both ate it together, no aggression detected. There were quite a few stand offs for grooming demands. They would stand facing each other and put their heads down smushed together. When neither would give in, Xena would nip Bolt. The first time it happened I freaked out because Bolt jumped so high, I thought she really hurt him. This happened a few more times and it became apparent she was not hurting him, as the other times he barely reacted. I ended with them both flopped on opposite sides of the tub.

Day 2:

Second day we were in the tub for about 45 min. Xena did not hump but the grooming standoff continued. I tried rubbing some banana on Xena’s nose to see if Bolt would lick it off. He did and semi groomed her in the process, which she loved. He didn’t continue once the banana was off though. They flopped and rested very close to each other (not touching but within inches). A couple of times Bolt looked like he was going to try to hump Xena, but she would then try to get behind him, and a kind of circling would begin. I didn’t want this to escalate so I broke it up. This happened maybe twice. There was also one time that Bolt kind of stood up on his hind legs and hit her nose with his front paws. She didn’t seem too bothered and they went back to lounging around the tub. It ended with them flopped very close to each other again.

Day 3:

Today is what really threw me for a loop. I put them both in the tub and all seemed like it was going to go as yesterday’s session went. Grooming themselves, the grooming standoff with each other continued, and they didn’t mind lounging around each other. The first weird thing was that Bolt pooped. Not weird for a rabbit, but weird in that neither of them had pooped the other two days. One time after a grooming standoff, however, Bolt went to hump Xena. She did not like this and ran away. I was scared it would turn to the circling so I broke it up. There was a few tufts of hair from Bolt trying to hump Xena, but she wasn’t hurt and seemed relaxed after the incident. This happened a lot more throughout the session. At one point, though, I noticed that Xena wasn’t trying to make her way to the back of him, rather, she was just trying to run. The bathtub is small-ish, but the next time it happened I let her run and him chase to see if it would resolve itself. The first time, it did. She ran, he chased, but after twice around the tub he gave up. The next few times it happened though, it didn’t seem like he was going to stop chasing. Not wanting her to become weary and scared of him, I started breaking it up. The next thing that happened was WEIRD. I went to pet her to comfort her (her and Bolt were on opposite sides of the tub) and Bolt ran over and put his head right next to hers. They lounged, Bolt tried to hump, they chased, I eventually stopped it, and went to comfort Xena again. This time he swatted me with his paws when I went to pet her. To be clear, Xena didn’t actually look distressed in any way, in fact she was loafed and pretty relaxed. I just felt super bad and guilty. But Bolt was almost acting like he didn’t want me to get near her. I could be imagining this though, as I went to pet her again after a few minutes and all seemed fine again. All of this seemingly crazy stuff was happening in between a lot of flopped lounging in the tub on both of their parts. They weren’t as close as yesterday, but still seemed relaxed.

Okay sorry for the length, I just wanted to get the first three days out there. Any thoughts? I’ve never had two rabbits before so am kind of new to this. On one hand they seem super comfortable with one another, they have no food aggression or problems grooming themselves or lounging around. On the other hand, though, they obviously have a dominance issue to work out. If Bolt won’t stop chasing Xena, should I be worried about her not trusting him? Or should I not worry about it as much given her seemingly calm demeanor after these interactions? 

Also, do you think the bathtub is the best place? It seems a bit small for them, but also is the only truly neutral place in my apartment for Xena.

Thanks for any and all help!

[Sirius&Luna]

Bonding bunnies is stressful!

How long have you had Bolt for, and how long did you pre-bond? (prebonding is the swapping of litter).

Honestly, this all sounds like its going as expected, or even well, for the first three days of bonding. I think lots of people underestimate how long it takes, but it seems to take most people about a month on average, and some much longer than that. So three days in is very early days, and they’re still figuring each other out.

You should stop chasing, as chasing often leads to circling and bunny tornadoes. You could also try a larger space (the bathroom floor for example?) as some bunnies just don’t do very well in the tiny bathtub space (I’m pretty impressed that they even managed to chase in there )

Bolt running over to sit next to her when you were petting her sounds like he wanted to be pet too, rather than trying to stop you being near her.

So, I would suggest that you keep going as you are (possibly trying a different space), but break up any chasing immediately. You can try sitting them next to each other and petting them both at the beginning of a session to get them both calm and feeling positive. You can also try things like a pile of hay for them to share, if neither is food aggressive.

Really, it’s just about time and patience!

[X&B]

Thanks for the quick reply!

Honestly, we didn’t start out with a lot of pre bonding at all. Xena and Bolt had two sessions at the rescue a couple days a part, then I was instructed to continue having sessions mimicking these sessions, but in a neutral territory. Also swapping the litter. Being new to this, I let Bolt get situated and then kind of was ready to hop in. Reading all these forums the last couple of days, I am realizing that pre-bonding is very important in a lot of these relationships. But also, things seem to be going fine (I think?), and neither of them has reacted to the litter or bowl swapping. They both are also keeping their litter box habits so far (which after reading was prepared for them to not do).

With how comfortable around each other they seem I haven’t seen a reason to stop the sessions, but also am open to it.

If you do think it’s okay to continue, maybe I can try my kitchen floor? Xena has been there but because it’s tile she has never stayed to sniff around, more like just passing through on the way to the laundry room.

Thoughts?

Also, I always enjoy seeing pictures, so here is one of mine during a flopped session the other night (Session 2 I think). When they are not in grooming standoff or humping, this is what they do.

[Sirius&Luna]

Personally, I think pre-bonding is really important. It made a huge difference with my aggressive girl bunny. That said, I do know lots of rescues who just take buns to bond in neutral territory skip the prebonding part, so obviously it’s not essential, I just think it can make things easier. 

The other thing that concerns me a tiny bit is that Bolt hasn’t had any time to settle into his new home. Often when a new bunny is brought home, and bonding starts immediately, you don’t see their true personality as they’re overwhelmed by the new environment and just submit to the old bunny. Then, a month down the line you suddenly get bunny fights when new bun feels at home and ready to assert himself. Again, of course this doesn’t always happen, but when you hang out in this forum a lot you see the same sort of things regularly!

So, I would suggest giving Bolt at least a couple of weeks to settle in. Even if there’s no fighting, it can still be quite overwhelming to move into a new home with new people and new bunnies 

Then, I think the kitchen would probably be fine. With bonding, its a lot of trial and error, so try them in there and see how it goes. If its worse than the bathtub, go back to a the bathtub or a smaller area of the kitchen. If it’s working, keep going. 

They do look super relaxed and adorable in that photo! honestly, that’s amazing progress for three days in. You most likely would be fine if you carried on bonding, but in my opinion the safest thing would be to let Bolt settle a little more first. 

[Doodler]

Hi X&B and welcome! Having just finished my first bond about a month ago I will spare you my two cents but I just wanted to wish you luck with your bonding venture. I totally understand how you can feel out of your element and how confusing bunnies can be during the process.

They are absolutely adorable together!!

[Author]

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