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Forum RAINBOW BRIDGE End of Life Question (Long and Sad)

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    • DesertBunny
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        This is my first post here and it is a very sad one. I lost my little one on 02/13. He was 11 years old. I am completely devastated. Worse yet, I am wondering if I did the right thing(s) prior to his passing.

        When my first bunny passed away over 12 years ago, it started when I saw him lying on the kitchen floor. I stood him up and he fell over again. I knew things were bad. So I cuddled him in the bunny chair and within 1.5 hours he had left me. He was also 11 years old.

        When he died, he screamed. A short wailing sound that tore my heart out.

        Since then I have read this is common with bunnies.

        Now to Jet, my latest loss.

        I steeled myself for an in-home death with him a long time ago. I tried to prepare for his final minutes (How exactly is such “planning” even possible?). I had hoped he would just pass in the night…..

        Sunday (02/12) night I spent over 3 hours with him in the same bunny chair.  I fed him that night and his appetite was “average.”

        Monday when I got up, I could tell right away he was not good. I cradled him in my arms and we walked  around the yard several times. I actually thought he had passed away a couple of times but he would occasionally move or clack his little teeth.

        I took him inside and shortly afterwards it started. His final spasms and then that horrible scream. But he didn’t scream once. Or twice. Or three times. I think there were five or more.  The worst sounds I ever heard in my life. I felt helpless, like he was begging me for help and all I could do was stand there. Then he died.

        What I want to know is why so many cries? It was gut wrenching. Something I don’t think I can face again. All I can think is he was scared and couldn’t figure out why this time I couldn’t  help him.  

        It’s very lonely here. My kitchen echoes now. My mind keeps replaying his last moments of life. Those cries will haunt me forever. I keep expecting to see him running around and then reality hits me.

        I sent an e mail to the Clinic telling that Jet had died  and they responded with a generic “We’re sorry” reply and the added tactless offer, “You can bring him by for a free paw print if you want.”

        You have to be kidding……!!!


      • Bam
        Moderator
        16835 posts Send Private Message

          I’m so sorry for your loss. You have my deepest sympathy. My bunny Yohio died in my arms, and he cried out – I’m so very grateful that I was with him, but it was horrible. Animals sometimes go through this agonal phase when they are dying, they cramp and cry out. It’s not certain they are aware, although I’m not sure anyone knows for sure. All I know is that it’s a normal, albeit awful, occurrence.

          I’m sorry he didn’t pass quietly, but you were with him, that’s what matters. He was 11 years old and that’s wonderful. You are obviously a truly great bunny parent. The fact that you’ve had two rabbits that got to be 11 years old is proof of that. I don’t think you did anything wrong.

          The vet clinic probably just wanted to offer some comfort. We all grieve in our own personal way, and what feels right for one person can feel offensive to another.

          Binky free, Jet.


        • Azerane
          Moderator
          4688 posts Send Private Message

            Hello there. I am very sorry to hear of your loss of Jet.

            It can be very hard to forget the last moments you spend with your rabbit instead of all the good moments that came before. Like Bam said, in those circumstances, it’s hard to know whether they’re aware or whether it’s simply a reflexive response to their last moments as their body shuts down.

            11 years is a wonderful life for a bunny to have, and I think it’s wonderful that you were there for him at his last moments when he would have needed it most. Binky free, Jet.


          • RabbitPam
            Moderator
            11002 posts Send Private Message

              I’m so sorry for your loss. I want to add that I had taken my first bunny, Spockie, to my vet during his last moments, and he died in my arms on the table just as she arrived. (It was evening and she came back to the office for us.) He did not scream, but she did say that she believed he was past all conscious feeling. That his body was shutting down systematically in his organs, and any responses were physical, but he was not alert and aware of it. I doubt that she was just saying that to comfort me. I don’t know what causes the screams, because whatever his condition it did not happen, but I would bet that it is an automatic reflex, as unbearable as it is to hear. I hope so.


            • Vienna Blue in France
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                Sorry to hear about your loss – I agree about the last bodily reflexes.
                It happened when my dog was put down, although it wasn’t a scream and I was aware it would happen, it didn’t make it any easier.

                I’m sure Jet was not aware of any pain at the end, as as Bam says, he was in your arms which is so important.

                (( Binky Free Jet ))


              • VivaLaBunz
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                  Sorry to hear about your loss =( My first bunny suffered from torticollis during the last 2 weeks of life. She died just hours before she was scheduled to be euthanized. It was very hard to watch her digress from her healthy state, but she showed no signs of pain. The “death cry” you speak of sounds absolutely horrible and I’m sorry you witnessed it, but there is nothing you could have done better to comfort your buns as they passed. Many humans do not even get the comfort level that your buns got when they passed.


                • vanessa
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                    I’m sorry, that sounds like a terrible thing to witness. Personally – it’s the first time I’ve heard of it, and I hope I never experience that. Different vets handle death differently. I’m sure your vet didn’t mean to upset you, although that does sound like a callous way to make money/help you commemorate your pet’s life. When my Merlin was euthanized, they were very compassionate with me. They gave me some time with him in the vets examination room alone, to think about my decision. They did ask what sort of burial plans I wanted to make, and let me know what they offered. I chose to cremate him, and I have his ashes in a nice wooden urn, with a stuffie resting on it – the same red/brown color as Merlin. They were very compassionate during all their communication, and sent me a nice card afterwards. It does sound like your vet’s office could stand to visit a crematory and learn how to communicate post-life offerings in a more compassionate way.


                  • DesertBunny
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                      February has been the worst month of my life. It started when I woke up and went in the rabbit room (used to be a kitchen!) and heard a tapping sound. It was Jet lying on his side in his rabbit maze. He had lost the use of his right leg. I took him to the vet and he thought it might be the EC flaring up. Although Jet was just coming off a 7 day Panacur treatment. We went for 7 more days. But it was more than EC. It might have been the ear infection he had in 2010. He had two surgeries for that (around $2000 total!).

                      Anyway, his condition got worse. Of course he couldn’t walk so eating, drinking and peeing/pooping all became issues. I was already syringe feeding him Critical Care so now blenderized pellets and separate waterings were mandatory. He did consume 45 cc x 4 times a day of food. But he continued to lose weight.

                      I made a big nest for him in a large cardboard box. Lined with soft sheets and I bought puppy pads, which I changed many times a day. I also washed his butt and legs to make sure there was no urine scald. He liked being dried with a hairdryer (no heat setting).

                      We would sit in the “rabbit chair” every night and I would pet him for at least an hour. Plus I took him on lots of walks in the yard so he could hear the birds and feel the sun on his little body. (He was blind from cataracts – that happened 2+ years ago but he soldiered through it). He groomed me with his tiny tongue and I heard him gently clacking his teeth right up to the last full day of his life. On his last night we sat together for 3+ hours. I just stroked his head and spoke quietly to him.

                      The weekend before he died we had a huge storm come through with lots of wind. I stood with him on a ladder and gently removed little tufts of his hair – letting the wind carry them away.

                      During his last two weeks something else happened to him that caused further loss of his little feet and legs. We would do exercises to try to let him stand by himself. And I exercised his little legs every night.

                      His last day 02.13 I got up and had a gut feeling something was really wrong. He was still alive. I washed and dried him and cuddled him for an hour. We took one more walk around the yard. And then he passed away.

                      I am a man. I am not supposed to cry. But this does it to me.


                    • DesertBunny
                      Participant
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                        I took him to PALS last Saturday. They have handled lots of bunny cremations and was recommended by the shelter here. His remains will be in a little cedar urn with an engraved name tag. The man there was very kind and that helped because I was a basket case. All the way down to the crematory I had to not lose it while my baby was sitting next to me in a cardboard box. We had taken so many rides to the vet in my truck….. he hated going in his carrier ………..but this time was his last trip ever.


                      • vanessa
                        Participant
                        2212 posts Send Private Message

                          Wow I’m so sorry. My EC bunny is also blind from cataracts. Whoever said men aren’t supposed to cry. We love our pets, male or female, we care, and grieve when they are gone. It makes us cry – that’s a natural human response. Your story sounds so familiar. While my Lancelot was paralyzed, I also exercised his limbs. You cared a great deal for your bunny, and he was fortunate to have you as a bunny-dad.


                        • DesertBunny
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                            Thank you. PALS called and his cremation is done. I will be picking up his remains on Saturday.


                          • sarahthegemini
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                              Your story is absolutely heartbreaking but please take comfort in the fact that you provided such wonderful care for your little friend and showered him with love until he was ready to go. And please don’t say you shouldn’t cry because you’re a man – heartache and loss knows no gender. You are an inspiration and all I can say is, despite your bun being very poorly, he was so lucky to have such a caring, compassionate friend.

                              Binky free little Jet xxx

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                          Forum RAINBOW BRIDGE End of Life Question (Long and Sad)