Stress bonding ran into a bit of a snag…

[Tana]

So we’ve had our fixed doe (Hazel) for a couple of years and decided to get her a companion bunny. After a trip to the humane society we chose another doe (Dandelion) as she had lived in a household with other animals and rabbits and we thought she’d be flexible to meeting another rabbit. 

We took them to neutral territory – the garage – and Hazel LOST HER MIND. She actually attacked me – unheard of for my sweet bunny who I’ve trusted with my baby niece.  Then she had a full on existential crisis. I don’t think she realized other rabbits existed… or that she herself was a rabbit… either way after realizing D existed she was very upset. I kept bringing them into the garage again and again. Hazel kept trying to attack D through the bars. After a few weeks she at least started to calm herself down and settled into nasty glares and peeing in her general direction. 

We went camping for a weekend and left a bunny sitter here. Unfortunately Dandelion broke out of her room (I assume to look for us) and wandered into the entry room. Hazel (who was behind another pet gate) went into a fury and knocked it down. They had a full knock-down drag-out unsupervised fight. The bunny sitter thought a rabbit had died given the amount of hair torn out. Hazel then limped back to her hutch, bleeding and tore up. We didn’t know about the fight until we got back and Hazel ran straight to me and buried her face in my hands she was so upset.  They both had pretty noteworthy wounds that took some time to heal. 

It was a HUGE setback. 

We gave them a break, keeping them separated and not doing any more introductions because Hazel is both angry and scared of Dandelion. 
Unfortunately a side effect of this is now Dandelion has established a territory that SHE cares about and has been getting defensive 

(forehead slap)

So after much more research I started to stress-bond them with car rides and (safe) exposure to dogs. Even in these situations they’ve attacked each other. D attacked Hazel while she was even dozing off! Hazel attacked D when she was cowering in the car. 

I had a HUGE breakthrough after 5 sessions and they were able to be side-by-side in a bin for 30 whole minutes (once we got out of the car!) while I pet them without one attacking the other. I got super excited and my hopes up that maybe, MAYBE I don’t have to have two lonely bunnies in the house. 

But now both rabbits have completely independently decided they do not trust me. It’s as if being terrified and forced to snuggle with their mortal enemy several times isn’t something they look forward to. 

They both refuse to go into their carriers or let me near them to pick them up (something Hazel didn’t tolerate anyway). I put food in – their favorite treats and they won’t go in until I’m too far away to shut the door. I’ve been putting food in their carriers every day twice a day and FIVE WEEKS LATER they are just starting to let me near the carrier while they’re in. 

I can’t just have one session every 4-6 weeks – they’re so suspicious I’m just not sure what to do. I have a divided household and it all feels like a mess. I’m very discouraged! 

[Pomandcourt]

Ugh! That sounds awful. I’m constantly terrified my rabbits are going to die when I’m out of town -_-

My girl is pretty moody and used to sulk for hours after a car ride anywhere (Including to my parents’ place which is basically a giant bunny play ground.) and she didn’t have the added stress of another rabbit. She’s FINALLY starting to be less cranky about it, but I make sure to give her a treat as soon as I put her in the carrier and one as soon as I open it to let her out. She doesn’t always eat it right away, but it’s still encouraging a positive experience.

Maybe the stress bonding is too much for them right now? I know that after bunnies have a huge fight like that it can be nearly impossible to get them to bond. So it’s promising that you’re making progress, even if it is slow.

Some people have had success using surrogate bunnies. You take a stuffed toy and rub it with the scent of the opposite rabbit and tuck a bit of their fur into the face. Then leave it in the other bunny’s cage. (So one for Hazel that smells like D and one for D that smells like Hazel) Supposedly it shows them that the other bunny isn’t a threat as when they interact with the surrogate, it doesn’t retaliate.

Also, have you tried switching their litter pans? We made HUGE progress when I did that. I’m not fully bonding mine right now, but I want them to at least not hate each other. My girls used to go after each other to fight and now they’ll check each other out a bit before I separate them.

I know it’s really discouraging to have such a big set back and now have them be angry with you. I’m sure they’ll come back to you soon. Good luck!

[JackRabbit]

I doubt you want to hear this (sorry!), but IMO, if you ever want to bond these two, you need them to forget each other first. Ideally, that means the two buns are never in sight or smell if each other. This can take several months. After that period, start to mix their scents by trading back and forth litterboxes, beds, toys, and then living spaces. This can get a little messy as they may digress with their litterbox habits until they get used to each other’s scents. Next would be brief face to face intros in neutral territory, and always end on a positive note. Like I said, sorry, but that fight (especially since no one was there to intervene at the time) could result in them not being bondable unless they “forget” the enemy first. Good luck!

[MoveDiagonally]

I agree with JackRabbit. It sounds like a situation in which you would need to start completely from scratch. Sometimes when bonding situations go down hill there’s no way to salvage them without scrapping it and starting over.

[Little Lion Head]

I really like JR’s advice. It may take awhile, but might be worth it. I like Pom’s advice about the surrogate, but maybe wait until they “forget” it each other.

So sorry you came home to learn about the bunny fight. How very scary for you and your buns. In the meantime, while you wait to start bonding again, this is a GREAT opportunity for you to re-bond w/ each bun individually. This might take a little while too, but as they start to see that seeing you doesn’t mean having to see the other bun, I think they’ll both start coming around. Good luck!

[Tana]

Thanks guys for your support! 

I try not to have regrets because I really have come to love Dandelion… but it seems that getting her has caused nothing but stress for Hazel and since Dandelion doesn’t get to be in the main living space with us that maybe it’s been worse for her. I don’t feel right taking her back to the humane society because it’s not a no-kill shelter and she’s already been abandoned once. I just can’t do it to her. I wish I had learned about and taken seriously the idea of bunny “dating.” beforehand. But no going back now.

I don’t want to give up… but 8 months into this process I just feel so discouraged. I want them to be friends so badly! 

The “big fight” happened about 7 months ago so at least some time has passed. And on the progress front at least Hazel doesn’t fling herself at the bars like she’s rabid or something. I’d try the separation-to-forget thing but Hazel doesn’t seem to forget anything!

My brother’s puppy scared her once almost 3 years ago and she is still so terrified of THAT dog  she won’t let me pet her until I’ve washed my hands if I’ve been near the dog. Also around the same time I had a friend who has hutch rabbits just reach down and pick her up and Hazel stomps at her and hides in her hutch whenever my friend comes and visits… which has only been twice since then. That rabbit has a tragically long memory, the little elephant. Is that uncommon? 

I’ll try anything. Stuffed rabbits, litter switching, isolation. I’m desperate!! 

[Little Lion Head]

I had a really hard time when we first brought Shamrock home b/c Pumpkin got to be in the main living space and he was stuck in our bedroom. Before we started bonding we switched their living spaces so that Shamrock could get used to the living room and get his scent all over everything. When you get to that point, that’s not a bad idea to switch their spaces up!

[Tana]

Ohhh… now isn’t THAT an interesting idea…
Thanks for giving me more ideas. This forum has given me fresh hope!

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