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The subject of intentional breeding or meat rabbits is prohibited. The answers provided on this board are for general guideline purposes only. The information is not intended to diagnose or treat your pet.  It is your responsibility to assess the information being given and seek professional advice/second opinion from your veterinarian and/or qualified behaviorist.

BINKYBUNNY FORUMS

Forum RAINBOW BRIDGE My sweet Oliver

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    • armynurse
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        I haven’t been on here in awhile,  but I knew exactly where to go where people would understand how I feel.

        This morning I said one last I Love You to Oliver, my sweet baby who was 12 1/2 yrs old. One had him since he was 4 months old and I was 16. This bunny has seen it all. He’s loved in 6 different houses with me,  flown cross-country 3 times,  DRIVEN cross-country once (which he loved,  by the way, staring out the window freaking out other drivers lol), had 2 bunny companions,  went completely blind and deaf,  but still got around by smell and vibrations and welcomed me home every single day for almost 13 years.

        Nobody I talk to seems to understand what a major loss this is for me. It was his time,  but it doesn’t make it any easier. I’m 29 years old,  member married,  no children,  live alone.  He was the one constant in my life that I looked forward to seeing each morning and evening. He was my baby. And its only day one,  but I can’t seem to understand how I’m going to be able to live without him. I’m so depressed, that I didn’t go home after we buried him. My other rabbit, Posey, and I are staying with my parents tonight because I didn’t think I could handle being home without Ollie there. I keep smelling him, hearing him snoring (a usual thing for him the past couple years), I can even still close my eyes and feel my face kissing his cheeks. 

        How do you survive such pain?  I can’t stop crying,  and when I do, my heart aches so much it makes me nauseous. I’m also worried about cultivating this relationship I have with Posey. He’s (yes, I said he-long story) only about 18 months old and I put so k much time into Oliver,  that I think he has pushed away. I obviously will spend this time with him,  but it’s definitely not the same bond I had with Ollie. My heart aches so much. How do you cope?


      • Sarita
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          He lived with you half your life so it’s perfectly understandable the loss you feel. Hugs to you. I think losing our first pet and having them for so long is always the hardest loss and really only time is going to make the pain go away.

          Posey isn’t Ollie but he still needs your love and you’ve proven with Ollie how much love and care you have :~)


        • mijOok
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            *My condolences to you* Like Sarita said, really only time is going to make the pain go away. But you have Posey and your family, so you are not alone.

            For how to cope, I’ve taken in the grief of losing my first pet as he was giving his life up for the better of another… so now it’s Posey’s turn to receive that love and attention you gave to Oliver. When my best friend lost her first pet that was from a pet store, she adopted for her second. When my dog of almost 11 years old suddenly passed (I too am around your age so I absolutely understand what you’re feeling with the amt of time you’ve spent with Oliver), that’s when I came across my bun, did my research, and adopted him. My bun is not a replacement for my dog, but rather a second chance; that has helped me in coping with the “what ifs” and regrets of things I wished I had done for my dog and am now doing for my bun. My dog passed 4 months before his birthday so I collected photos of him for a collage and on his would’ve been 11th birthday, I held a “party” with my family that was also grieving his death to celebrate his life and hung up the collage on my living room wall. I also made paw print cut outs for each family member to write a message to him and glued them to one big paper heart.

            Oliver was a lucky bun to have been in such a loving home, and this is just another adventure where he will now live in your heart forever. Be strong <3


          • armynurse
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              He actually wasn’t my first pet. My first bun, Sniffles, lived to be 8 years old. Got him when he was only 8 weeks old. But I guess it’s way worse because Oliver was the major pet for a big chunk of my adult life so far.

              I went home today for a couple hours to clean up. Cried almost the full 2 hours. But grad school started today and I’m back to work tomorrow, so thankfully, I’m able to be a little distracted. Who knew a little 5 lb bunny could take up so much room in your life and heart.

              On a side note, Posey is starting to act a little weird. He’s chewing on the paper liners I use in their pen which he has never done before and is allowing me a lot more time to love on him. I think he must be grieving a little. I DID let him sit with Oliver’s body for a few so he could figure it out. It was heartbreaking. He sniffed him all over then started grooming him Very hard.

              Thanks for the support guys. Only bunny people seem to understand bunny people. Mijook, I’m so sorry to hear about your dog. I get what you’re saying about Oliver’s passing being a gift to Posey so he has a turn now. I never thought of it that way. What a beautiful concept.


            • Zombie-Sue
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                You just take it day by day, and be assured that what you’re feeling is okay.

                Posey probably misses him. Remember that you two are going through the same thing.


              • Deleted User
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                  I love that you were able to include a sweet funny short story of Oliver in your post (you made me smile, laugh actually – trying to imagine this bunny with his head out the window driving cross country freaking everyone out!) So cool – super funny! Then you brought a tear to my eyes. I totally get how no one seems to understand your grief – I suffered (& still do) in silence. I am so pleased you chose to share your sadness and to get comfort here at BB. I am truly sorry for your loss, its devastating and I’m sorry to say it will take a little while for that sick feeling to leave your tummy. But once it does, and with time (time – I promise you), it does get better. You’ll still have moments when you think about Oliver and cry but mostly you’ll remember him and it won’t hurt so much. Before you know it, it will be “remember when Oliver did….?” and you’ll be in stitches! What got me through during my time (though it didn’t lesson the tears) was knowing what a great ‘life’ my pet had, and how enriched it was cause I was in his life. And your overwhelming grief – that is testament to the happiness and love that Oliver gave you – that is the best ever! Your so lucky. And I agree, Posey would be missing him too. Take comfort with each other. Thinking of you at this very sad time armynurse and Posey.

                  Edit/Add – I had an afterthought that I would like to share…. I lost my poodle after 15 years – I had a plaque engraved and attached it to the rock/boulder sitting on his grave in the garden. It reads – ‘Fifteen years in my arms, forever in my heart’. It gives me comfort everyday.


                • Bam
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                    When my first dog Nala died I lit a tea-candle for her every evening for a year. I often cried. The pain of loss can be gruesome, I remember I felt like I couldn’t breathe. She was so much a part of me it felt unreal that she would die and leave me behind. She was 12,5 years old and a German Shepherd so she didn’t go “before her time” – that is a consolation to me now. The sorrow never goes away completely (it’s been 5 years now) but you come to accept it, nature doesn’t allow pets the same lenght of life as their humans.

                    You can probably create a closer relationship to your Posey now. He will need you as a companion more now when Oliver isn’t around anymore. And you need him, even if you don’t know it yet. Your love for Oliver won’t diminish because you love one more pet. But I know it can feel like a kind of betrayal almost.


                  • kamdynandsunshinesmom
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                      I am going through the same thing. My sweet girl sunshine that I adopted 3 1/2 years ago passed away suddenly on Dec. 30, 2013 my heart aches for her as well. She lived with me and my other rabbit in my bedroom. The time i use to spend with her I just don’t no what to do. I have another rabbit who is disabled and requires alot of care. I did get my rabbit cremated and her urn is on my dresser. I am also just getting over the flu and have that to deal with. I know my sunshine would want me to be a good mother to my other rabbit kamdyn. It is very hard to move forward. Grief is one of the most excruciating pain you will ever go through. Try to stay strong I know its hard.


                    • armynurse
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                        That’s so sweet of you, AndHenry. Do you mind me asking where you go the plaque? I’ve been thinking about doing something more permanent for all 3 of my buns who are buried in my parent’s back yard. I’ve been trying to find a small colorful “rainbow bridge” to place there with the flowers that were planted.

                        Oliver was really unique. Had the craziest tricks. When we was a little younger, I had to tape my fridge door shut when I left the house because he would get it open, figured out how to get into the veggie drawer and pull a full head of parsley out and eat it. I know my other bun Meg, was in on it too, but he was the one with the green mouth LOL

                         

                        Bam, zombiesue and Kamdy, Thank you for the kind words. Sounds like I’m definitely not alone in the way this feels. I’ve lost a few close friends and family in the last several years, as well, and I know grief well, but losing a pet is almost a different kind of grief. It definitely gets better faster, but that same gut-wrenching feeling haunts you for awhile. My dad actually made a point yesterday “Even after losing 3 buns so far over 20 years, it must still be worth the pain since you keep getting more pets.” Yes, it is. The joy they have brought to my life definitely outweighs the grief.


                      • Jessie1990
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                          I have lost two rabbits and I was devastated, but nothing compares to the loss I still feel over my first pet, a cat named Banana. I chose him when I was 5 and he just died this last year at the age of 17. He was my first memory, and I hold it very close to my heart. All I can say is the cliche phrase, “the ones we love never truly leave us.” I believe it is true, because anytime I go out to my parents farm, I still feel like he is there waiting to run up the driveway when I come home to visit. It is a very special feeling that I think only those who have loved and lost a VERY special pet know. Oliver will never truly be gone.


                        • Deleted User
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                            armynurse, I am so pleased we were all able to comfort you here at BB.
                            The plaque I got for my Molly was from a ‘trophy shop and engraver’ – he was able to offer me any size plaque, (& I think I chose brass? I can’t quite remember now as I was still in the beginning of my grief at the time, and it still looks beautiful 3 years later outside in the garden). His engraving was professional and beautiful being done via a machine. Because of this I did have to wait 48 hours for it to be ready for collection. Months later I noticed that most of the ‘key cutting’ places that offer engraving also supply plaques.
                            The area you described in your parents backyard with all the flower sounds like a beautiful place to visit your bunny’s.

                            Edit/Add – Sorry armynurse, I had a think and I don’t think it was brass, I’m sure the guy said brass didn’t hold up well in the outdoor weather? He used a plaque made from something that looked just as beautiful (and heavy) that was more weather tolerant. I’m sure if you decide this is what you would like, a simular suggestion will be offered to you. Also, just thought I’d add, because we attached ours to stone we couldn’t drill, so used liquid nails to attach it and I reckon it’s better than if we had of used screws. Cheers armynurse.


                          • LittlePuffyTail
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                              I’m so very sorry for your loss. I hope you take comfort in the fact that Oliver lived a long life and was obviously a very lucky and loved bunny.

                              (((((Binky Free Oliver)))))


                            • RabbitPam
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                                armynurse, I just want to say how sorry I am to read about your losing Oliver. It is a very personal kind of grief, because it is a daily life of love that you shared, and having him for over 12 years is wonderful, even as it is so painful. It just is, and we both understand and dread living, and reliving, a loss ourselves.

                                He had a terrific and rich life with you. Some bunnies kind of seem more special and different than others to us, even though we can’t explain why. I know that I won’t have the same relationship with other bunnies that I had with Spockie, so his place is special in my heart. Yes, your bunny Posey is grieving too. Spending more time together is healing for you both.

                                Don’t rush yourself, and don’t rush making changes in your home if it is too upsetting now. You will get there. Just remember that you can post here as much as you need to, and we will be here for you.{{{{{{{{Hugs}}}}}}}}}}}


                              • kamdynandsunshinesmom
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                                  I am so glad you are doing some better. I to have lost alot of people and pets in my life over the last several years. I first had to put my beloved pet rabbit of 8 years to sleep then 6 weeks later my dad died. Then a close friend of mind died 6 weeks later then 6 weeks later I lose a pet rabbit I had for 3 days. Then a week ago I lose my beloved sunshine. I will pray that you are comforted.


                                • armynurse
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                                    Kamdy, I am soo so sorry you had to go through so much! That is horrible. I don’t know how you survived so much in such a short period of time… you must be very strong. As I said, things are getting better, but today I’m going home for good after 5 days. I’m a little scared of what it will be like once I’m by myself and how Posey will react. I appreciate all the support guys. It has helped a lot.


                                  • kamdynandsunshinesmom
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                                      I look back and sometimes don’t know how I did it. I am at a different place now in my life. I am going back to church and that has helped alot. Keep your head up. Praying for you and posey.

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                                  Forum RAINBOW BRIDGE My sweet Oliver