Mirbear, I'm sorry you are dealing with this. I have to say however, you have always known your mom's feeling about the rabbits and she's been honest with you about it. It's impossible for us to know why your mom is doing this, but I'm sure she has her reasons. If money is an issue, it's probably because she has to put family first before the animals. Money matters alot, it really does and if it's a matter of paying rent and feeding the family, that comes first.

I know for you all of this doesn't seem fair. I know I felt this way many times about my parents but now that I'm older I understand why they made the decisions they did.

it would be great if i could blame this on money but i can't unfortunatly because money at this time isnt a big issue. if she would just agree to it we do have the means to make condo's. and the whole thing of not wanting them in the house. it just annoys me. we had the perfect spot for them, they were out of the way, and there was a window right there for light or fresh air, but she ruined all that when she said they would never be allowed inside the house. ever. now that spot sits empty while my bunnies live in an un heated un aircondition garage in tiny store bought cages for the rest of their lives or untill i move out. oh or if she decides to enforce me getting rid of them. after she said they could live in the house and we'd make them condo's then went back on it all like she always does. thats how she got me to agree to moving into this stupid house. and i cant even talk to anyone abut it because i have no friends here and im not allowed to leave the property !!! im isolated, and the 2 friends i do have - my bunnies - she wont let me do whats best for them!!

miranda, I feel what you are saying. It is so hard to accept a parent's wishes when those wishes are based on a different understanding of the subject matter. What concerns me in your post is that you say you can't get in a word to explain yourself. Seems your mother is preoccupied with other things and I'm sorry about that.
can you sort of schedule an audience with your mother, a set time where you are allowed to speak your mind? Then you could start by asking to make a condo in that garage even, it can be a neat setup for them. Or, ask for a temporary basement housing permit for the rabbits for your birthday to show her that it can work.
About not having friends... I used to do the Big Brothers and Sisters when I lived in ON and it is a great thing. You could think about trying it out! Your school can set it up for you: either you can get an older (adult) mentor to be matched with, or you could get a younger kid to meet with regularly to help them with stuff. You might meet really cool people.~

I think Petzy's idea about Big Brothers and Sisters is a great idea. Petzy is there a website or a contact that you can give Mirbear? I highly recommend this for you.

I know your Mom has alot going on - it's hard at your age to understand her worries and concerns and I know she has many. I know she loves you too and she's looking out for you. Your Mom is really not your enemy, but I know it's hard for you to see this now. Hugs to you.

lol let me clarify, i have friends but we just moved to a new place so at the moment i have no friends because everyone in my new area is like 60.
and my mom wont let me talk because she doesnt like talking about bunnies. :\

Well at least you have everyone here to talk to about the problems with the bunnies - I know calling your friends where you were living or getting it out here is not the same as getting to hang out with someone and vent. But I'm sure you know everyone here feels for you and wants you to have happy bunnies too.

They are, at least, safe it sounds like in the garage. Perhaps if you feel like she is trying to do this to get her way, you could try to compromise? Offer to do more around the house, or something to make her life better. If then maybe in exchange she would allow you to move them into the basement, or at least set up the cubes in the garage. Sometimes you have to take the high road and even when you feel you are right, go to somebody else and be humble and suggest a compromise. It can be frustrating, but at least more productive than a standoff like you are in now which is achieving nothing except to make you all more mad at each other.

My other suggestion is that maybe you should ask her to explain her feelings and why she does not want to do the things she said she would. Again, you would have to take the high road here, even if you feel you are in the right. Perhaps if you understood what her hesitation is, you would have a better chance of coming up with a solution.

I don't think it sounds like you are being unreasonable when you try to talk to her, but it is really hard to know how it may seem to her. She may just be stressed out right now because of the move or totally unrelated things, so before you go blaming her I would try to find out what the cause is here. Parents often keep things that are bothering them from their family, so maybe money is an issue, or maybe it is something else. We are all just human and none of us are perfect, so I would suggest trying to give her a chance and negotiate. Even if you don't get an improvement in the bunnies situation, it may make both of you feel better.

she said she had comprimised with me by even letting me have them. so unfortunatly that didnt wwork. she thinks the bunnies are unsanitary apperently. so that the reason she wont have them in her "new house"

Well if she feels they are unsanitary perhaps you need to clean their cage more often.

Honestly, it does sound like she has compromised by letting you haven them and it's up to you to make sure that you keep your end of the bargain.

If it were me, I would clean their cages every single day and then once a week do a very thorough cleaning. I totally understand that your mom wants to keep the new place fresh and clean - nothing wrong with that.

I have 5 rabbits and I clean their areas twice a day by vacuuming their area and giving them fresh water. I probably don't change their litter as often, every 4 days as I would for one or two rabbits if I only had that many.

I'm sorry you are not seeing eye-to-eye with your mom. Unfortunately, sometimes these things happen, and as the adult, she does have the final say. Living in a garage, for the most part, they are still protected from the elements, and I know you take very good care of them, so they do have it much better than many rabbits. This may just be the best you can do for them at this point.

they get cleaned 1-2 times a day (if i clean them in the morning and their cages are dirty by dark i clean them again (twix -.-)
thanks beka, and thank you to everyone who's replied.. i have a bit more perspective on it now than i did yesterday, thank you.

Hi,

I've never posted before, even though I'm planning a post to introduce my new bunny soon, but i had an idea I thought might help you.

Maybe you could think of something that you could 'trade' in return for your mother being more understanding or compromising even more with regards to where the bunnies are kept.

I'm not sure what your grade situation is, or whether you already do chores at home or are of an age to have a job like babysitting. However, maybe if you bargained with her that you could bring the bunnies inside or at least make condos for them in the garage if you finish the school year with a certain GPA or something, or instead say that you'll do certain chores in return for better housing for your pets, she might be more open to considering that.

You could even put it all down in a 'contract' lol seems kind of funny but I actually did this with my father when I was in middle school. I really wanted parrots and I made a contract with him that if I behaved all summer he would get some for me.

hope you find a way to communicate better with your mom!

Mirbear, would your Mum be supportive of you doing some casual work where you live now? You could have an independant income to do the things you want for the pets. In a new place there may be new opportunities for work and it's a good way to meet new people too.

Well, Mirbear, I'm glad to hear you are already feeling better! But I had thought of the Big Brothers not just to make friends, but to also get you involved in something in your new area ~ If you ever feel you want to try it here's their site.

www.bbbskw.org/en/Home/default.aspx

im not nessisarily concened about involements and such quite yet, im amazing at making friends and getting involed and only 2 weeks untill i start school, but i will deffinatly keep that in mind

I understand. I have no doubt that an outgoing person such as yourself would easily make friends! Keep in mind, though, that sometimes, parents like to see things like involvement in stuff... it will score you high on the maturity chart

I am glad things are getting better for you, I know this is so hard on you. Everyone here has said many things that could work and are very supportive, I hope things work out for the best and you get to make those condos inside! I used to post on the guinea pig forums, they started groups about womens health and my mom was going through menopause and omg we were fighting everyday over the most stupid things and didn't get along at all. It was TERRIBLE. She didn't speak to me for 2 weeks when I spent the day with my dad's parents that just moved from hawaii that DAY over her mom and dad from only 3 hours away. 2 entire weeks. Even my boss at work was calling me to check on me because I was such a stressed out mess. My mom has come around to the rabbits, my dad has not. I really do understand how hard it is and I just hope you get through it okay! I am sure you are nervous about your new school but excited too! When I first meet new people I ask them if they have pets and then work my way into telling them about my bunnies! Just hang on, things will get better! *hugs*

i can understand how hard it is, for i am constantly telling my mom why they should be inside. and i would say about once a month my mom gets really mad about the rabbits and they are extremely close to being put out side. i know how hard this can be and overwhelming.

don't give up!

Can i suggest rent? Tell you mother that in excange for 1 week of bunnies in the house you will do 3 extra chores. Or, try to get your mom to bond a bit with the buns (Crazy I know, but hey, might work!). Dont get on her nerves. You might end up going to college and your mom getting rid of the buns altogether. I know its frustrating (My Parents are NOT animal fans) and my moms the same way. She wants me to put my guineas in my closet, or sell one of them. Everytime she offers a problem i give a solution, then, guess what, another problem! Ugh. I wish you the best of luck.

Lintini, my mom JUST started menopause, like in the last few months :\ and we never got along to begin with, so things have been EXTREAMLY difficult.
as for a new school im not nervouse lol i dont mind the change.

I find this menopause talk a tad insensitive... there are members on here of all age groups. how would you guys feel if your actions were blamed on PMS~

oh, sorry to all of whom that may of offended.

I'm honestly surprised your mother let you get a 2nd bunny if the 1st was such a source of conflict. While not ideal, there is another option for a potential compromise which may work. Your mother may be more receptive to housing ONE bunny indoors. Would you be open to finding a new home for one of your bunnies and working with your mom to bring the other bunny inside?

Kyoshi brings up a good point too, depending on what the future holds for you, you need to have a plan for when you are older and going to school. It would be easier to make arrangements for one bunny. I don't usually advocate people giving up their rabbits, but especially with Hershey's recent health scare, you need to keep both of their best interests in mind.

I am talking about my own mother, different woman handle it differently and I didn't mean to offend anyone but it happens so I don't know how it is insensitive. I really don't see how saying I had family troubles with my mothers health condition offends you but whatever. I'm really done with it.

I'm very sorry you're having this trouble. I know how hard it is when your parents don't support what you want to do, especially with rabbits.

Could you possibly just get a few minutes when she's in a good mood to talk about it? Show her examples of how good your bunnies are with the litterbox. Tell her how you clean the cage every day. Show her info online about how clean bunnies can be, and how rare it is that you'd catch some disease from them. Show her pictures of indoor habitats that are clean and look good. Most importantly, stay calm while you talk to her about it - if you get upset, she might get the wrong impression. If all else fails, you could always try to make her bond with the rabbits a little! My parents became much more accepting of my rabbit after they saw how sweet he is.

Good luck!

unfortunatly fluffy bunny i have tried most of that, for example, i sent her an e-mail everyday for a month listing benifits of spay/neuter. thats when she started threatening to get rid of them. my mom likes hershey to an extent, but we've had hershey since she was that tiny little ball of fluff that was just too cute. she overall doesnt like them much.

Beka, ive had hershey for a long time before i knew anything about rabbits (or well i know now i knew nothing) by the time i found this forum i had had another rabbit named kisses along with hershey, hershey originally belonged to my little sister who took horrible care of her, and just recently (last month or so) she's been given to me, twix i got in december, after i had been told to re-homed kisses, so anyways point being, my mom at the time. didnt mind hershey so much, and let ME get my own bunny. since hershey is the long time resident. i've been trying to sway my mom and i have opt'd about getting rid of twix, but she wants them both gone, so everytime i try and comprimise by saying i'll give one up she just sais why dont you save the hassle then and get rid of both then?

with her there doesnt seem to be any chances of a win-win or even a comprimise. even my dad (of whom my bunnies have taken a likeing to destrying his his and only his house) lets them stay inside, and he was raised on a farm where rabbits were meat not pets!!

i used to think of my mom being so compassionate for animals! she worked at a vet clinic when she was a teen and wanted to be a vet for crying out loud!! i have lost all respect for her in that era since we have gotten these bunnies.

Well, regardless of what happens, remember that you won't be a teenager under their roof forever. It's probably not much consolation right now, but before you know it, you'll be an adult and able to make your own decisions.

lol and i can't wait. i was born in september so im one of the youngest students in my grade, there for i'll be 17 when i graduate highschool so i get to move out younger :]

Don't be too eager to move out.. it gets expensive. Wait til you're out of school, and have a decent, non-minimum wage job to do so. trust me! lol

Ditto.

You don't want to move out right away. If you find a good paying job, do it. But if its minimum, you can't live off of that. It sucks, I know it.