So yesterday my sisters friends Mom (also the person who gave me Lulu) came over to get some CD's we had for her. I asked her if she wanted any hay because I had 6 extra bales leftover from the rabbits. She tells me "Ohh, its not good enough for the rabbits." I told her, "no the rabbits wont eat it. They only like 1st crop". Then she asks us how our cat Emmett is doing. (for those of you who don't know, he had an injury that involved a huge hole in his head.) We told her he was doing good and he gets his stitches out tomorrow. She then says to us " Oh you don't have to do that! I can take them out for you!" I told her that their were other reasons he had to see the vet for. There is no way I would let her take them out. Then she tells us "I can't believe how any one would spend that much on a cat! Its just stupid!" Hello! We are standing right here! Shut up! agh! I told my Mom what she said this morning and my Mom was pretty upset. She said I should have told her "I can't believe any one would put down a horse because they don't feel like taking care of it!" (Long story short, they had a horse who was only 15 and put him down because they "Claimed" He was dangerous but it was really just lack of training and my sister wished she would have known and been able to take him as he would have been a very good horse with a little work!) Sometimes people just need to keep their opinions to themselves! She has done this more then once. When she found out I was going to spay Lulu she got upset and said their was no reason to and wanted to call me and talk to me about it. their was no reason for her to do that. She was MY rabbit and YOU gave her to me. Sorry. just needed to vent

just wanted to make something clear. I would never say those things to her face, but sometimes i wish i could.

I agree!

Wow. She sounds like a pushy lady. Sounds like you handled it right though. When I got older (because I knew lots of people in my childhood like this) I did my best to avoid people like this and I'm so much happier I never have to talk to them again. Maybe when you move you will be free of whatever connection you have to this lady.

I'm sorry. That has to stink having to deal with that. I'm so glad I don't have anyone that opinionated in my life! You have a ton more self-control than I do. I would have blown up most likely. I'm of the opinion that If I want your opinion, I will ask for it

You're nicer than I am. People like that I tend to just leave out of my life. I don't care who you are, if you can't respect my feelings towards animals, I don't need you near me. Sorry she's like that.

Vent away! Don't you wish you could say these things sometimes? I generally avoid conflict, so I'd never say those things either, but I bet it would feel so good.

I hate people like that! I hate know-it-alls and I hate people that dont respect my love and devotion for animals. Grrr...Im frustrated for you!

I dont understand people! That lady seams super rude, i wouldnt have been as nice as you were LOL but you did the right thhing

I am dealing with something similar with a relative of my boyfriend's, and how we manage a dog (that was never hers to begin with, and they don't even have a dog in their household!). Quite frankly it is none of her business! I am sure there are trivial things that she spends money on that you would find ridiculous but make her happy. You are happy with your decisions and that is all that matters. You certainly aren't hurting anyone.

Thanks guys! I knew you guys would understand what it feels like! I just can't wait to move! But... their will probably be people their who say those things too.

Ugggg I wouldn't have been able to keep my mouth shut! Especially since I hate it when people treat horses like things, use them and get rid of them when they don't want to bother with them anymore

Ditto that, bunnyfriend.

Yeah it pretty sad. I just keep thinkimg that if we would have known we could have saved him!

I think the important information here is that she is your sister's friend's mother. She isn't your friend. She isn't your mother's friend. So you have every reason (and so does your mother) to limit your interaction with her. I disagree with your mother's wish that you had continued an argument with this woman that your mother would have made. You were right not to push it, and to back away from all interference. Let your mother get into a useless argument with her if she wants to - you can (and should) politely leave whenever possible. It was also the right thing for your mother to protect you from this woman "having a talk with you."

The reason we have manners is to be polite in situations when we'd rather not. When up against someone who doesn't believe in doing that, usually the only thing that works is cutting them off, not giving in to their goading. That's when they start to really enjoy being rude AND getting your goat. Don't give them the satisfaction.
(Oh, another thing to try - look very vacant, stare off into the distance, then bring your attention back to her in startled way and exclaim "Oh, I'm sorry! I wasn't listening.")

I just want to add, if you and your family are able to take in another horse there really are dozens (hundreds, thousands?!?) that need rescuing right now. I had to put my horse down due to behavioral and medical problems and the simple fact that there are more horses than there are available homes, especially for difficult cases like my girl was.

RP:

I disagree with your mother's wish that you had continued an argument with this woman that your mother would have made.

Oh no! That is not what I meant! My mom didn't really mean that. She probably wishes she could have said that but never would! I didn't mean to make it sound like that!
KytKattin: It wouldn't be convenient right now to have a horse because we just took down out horse fence and are moving in two weeks, but if we knew this horse was going to put down we would have made it work. We would have boarded it until my sister moved and could keep it at a camp she works for in the summer (its a horse camp). I hope to someday get a horse again, but my parents don't really want another one.

what area do you live in. im in michigan...lots of horse camps.

I am in central WI but will be moving to northern WI in a few weeks. I go to a horse camp in the summer in the UP.